"Tries so hard to walk away, she falls in love instead . . ."
I love myself some eighties hairmetal, especially Tyketto.<3 I’m cooking macaroni and cheese for Jordan and Rome and one can of chicken noodle soup for myself. I gained one-point-five pounds between today and yesterday, and I’ve been working out so loyally. It really is depressing, but it could just be muscle mass since it does weigh more than fat. Is it really so much to ask for to go from one hundred five to one hundred pounds? Yes, I’m really whining about this. Don’t give me that shit about “Oh, you’re so skinny, so stop whining. How would you like to be 3134564514564565 pounds?” I don’t fucking care about your body, okay? This is my body, and I am working on achieving my ideal body. Just in case anyone is wondering. I am going to be sixteen in about two months, and I am 5’2”-5’3”. No, I am not bragging. I am just venting about how I feel and filling in anyone who cares on the details. Of course, my lovely baby comforts me and tells me it doesn’t matter “what weight you are” because he will always love me.(: He has a funny choice of words from time-to-time. I will always love him, too.(; I just don’t want to be large, and I don’t want him to be large either regardless that I will love him anyway. Not only is it unattractive, but it’s even more unhealthy. Well, today is the last month in June. Who else is excited about how quickly the summer is going by? I sure am loving it.<3 My best friend is supposed to be coming this weekend if everything works out for us. I may also finally be going school shopping. I’ve lost count of how many times this has been pushed back and how long ago it’s been honestly. Then, on the sixteenth I have yet another orthodontist appointment.<3 This means I will be looking through magazines again in the lobby looking for things to rip out and hang on my wall.<3 Four hearts already, wow. Then, three days later on the nineteenth, Nick and I will be picking up our schedules for this upcoming school year—grade eleven for me and grade nine for him. I somewhat like the idea of having my funny little brother at the same school as me no matter how much of a dork my friends may think he is and no matter how repulsive I find his friends. I’ll have to see about getting my mother to take us out to a movie after like she did last year for Nick’s middle school orientation. That was awesome when she did that. We went see the sixth Harry Potter movie. If it’s out by then (isn’t this final one coming out this July?), maybe we’ll see the last Harry Potter movie this time. That would be awesome. After I found out my schedule for this year and what supplies I need, I can start working on my binder covers—GK/Jack Barakat, A Skylit Drive, All Time Low, blessthefall, Artist Vs. Poet, The Maine, There for Tomorrow. I doubt I’ll need that many binders all year long, but I just want to give myself options, and that is the order I plan to choose them in as well. Well, I think this post is long enough. I’ll finish cooking, finish on the Internet, shower, and finish today’s work hopefully all in time to catch more Degrassi starting at five p.m. CST.(:
Wow, it’s already the end of June. I am filled with a mix of emotions. First of all, I’m happy because summer is always boring as shit for me. Second of all, I’m devastated because Aaron won’t be there. Okay, the “mix of emotions” included only two. Fuck me. Please don’t. It’s 12:30 p.m. I will watch ATL’s Silent Library today right before Degrassi. Therefore, I must go work now. Well, I have a little bit of chicken noodle soup left, and I have a couple more things to check while still on the computer. Zomg, Kyle Simmons from A Skylit Drive @ replied me last night.<3 I didn’t even expect him to after I sent him a tweet, but he did, which made it even better. He is like my second largest celebrity crush, ‘k? ‘K.[:
I was going to treat your eyes to lovely pictures of him, but eh, Tumblr isn’t letting me copy and paste pictures with my post. ;~;
Oh you know just beat Voldermort when I was 11. Then his memory when I was 12. Saved my godfather when I was 13. Competed in a Triwizard Cup when I was 14 then watched my sort of friend die and witnessed the rebirth of the Dark Lord but made it out alive. Oh when I was 15 I fought Voldermort again and found out that I have a destiny and that I had to kill Voldermort if the Wizarding World were to find peace. When I was 16, I had to deal with that info and school and find Horcruxs in order to kill Voldermort and had to watch my mentor die at the hands of my enemy. 17 was a rough year too. I couldn’t return to school, Voldermort took over the Wizarding World, I chased down Horcruxs with my best friends, almost lost one, found the place where my parents died protecting me, then I broke into a bank, stole a dragon, flew to Hogwarts and lead my friends into battle against the forces of evil, losing some of them at the hands of evil wizards, then sacrificed myself so the war could end and give my friends a chance. Turns out I managed to kill the part of Voldermort in me then killed him and saved the entire world. And that was all in just a span of 7 years.
Hey Edward Cullen, you’ve been around forever. What the fuck have you done besides whine and bitch and moan?
I don’t really enjoy reading the Harry Potter books, but fuck, this is amazing.<3
Time for an even mooore pointless blog. I am supposed to be watching Lie to Me right now. “Supposed to be” as in “I have it on to watch it, but things keep happening that I get distracted. Now I am not watching it, I suppose.” Ughh, speaking of Lie to Me, I have the advertisement of it that I tore out of a magazine at my brother’s orthodontist appointment this past Friday along with the picture of Jared Allen (NFL Minnesota Vikings) sacking Tony Romo (NFL Dallas Cowboys) I got in the same way that same day on my wall now. Speaking of my wall (oi, these “speaking of”s are getting annoyingly redundant but that might just be me), I moved my iPod dock (regardless my father told me not to when I first brought it up) on my wall shelf along with my Chrysler 300 and Cadillac Escalade Hot Wheels, RC Cadillac Escalade, orange and lime green duct tape giraffe statue from Art I from freshman year, mouthpiece, remotes, and pail of of tacks. My phone is charging. I really want it right now. I want to text Austin and Aaron. I don’t even know what to call Aaron anymore. We decided to go separate ways but still talk after he graduated, but we decided that we still want to get together again when the time is right. We still act the same as before we decided to go our separate ways since we decided screw that, but if we see each other again, it will be a while from now—like probably a couple to a few years. Therefore, I wouldn’t consider him my boyfriend. We still tell each other “I love you,” “-hugstightly-,” “-kissespassionately-,” “<333333333,” “I miss you so much,” “I want to be with you so badly,” “you’re the greatest thing that ever happened to me,” call each other baby, etc. Gah, he can’t be just a friend. I was told he cannot be a significant other because that is someone you have sex with, which we have not yet. I’m just going to call him my baby, love, etc. Is the love making you sick yet? Too bad. I’m happy, and if you dislike it, I really don’t give a fuck. This is the end.
I just unfollowed a few people here because I got tired of the constant ATL spam. I love the band to death, but I don’t want to get tired of them because of people who just annoy the fuck out of me. Whatever. On Twitter I asked for people’s Tumblr URLs, and we could follow each other. That wasn’t too successful, so fuck all of you. No, I’m not angsty or mad or pissed off at all. I’m just honest. I’m not sorry for unfollowing anybody either. You annoyed me. That’s all there is to it. I got tired of everyone’s constant reblogging of the same things and conversing via that and their caps and nonsense. Sigh. I think it’s still all tied up with the social awkwardness even via Internet. I’m just going to let go of these ridiculous things that annoy me and do what I told myself a long time ago I would do—let things go when they bothered me. Therefore, I need to take myself to Twitter again and unfollow some more. I hate doing it because I lose followers, but it feels necessary. I may not even unfollow anyone who knows at this point. Now, out of curiosity I will ask (or tell—however you want to perceive it) to re-blog this if you even read this, and leave some sort of comment of whatever when you re-blog if you read the entire post. This part is just curosity, but in advanced (I will still thank you afterwards as well) thank you. I love you.<3
Tumblr bores me to death. It’s the same shit over and over. I love ATL to death—don’t get me wrong—, but this shit is getting old. Yet, I still come back and love Tumblr. What the hell is my problem? I have work to do and a journal entry to finish anyway.
Gosh, I’m tired. I don’t like being up early. Before, my mother felt sorry for me and let me sleep a little later the days my great-grandfather didn’t work. Before that, my aunt was home and would let me sleep. Then, since last Wednesday through this past Tuesday, my mother was on vacation. Now, everything is back to normal, and I have to wake up early again to watch my siblings. It was never this early before. I can barely handle it, and I still keep myself up usually past midnight and get mad at myself afterwards for doing it. Tomorrow night, my best friend is supposed to be coming sleep over. I’m excited for that. Zomg, if I don’t finish my book between today and tomorrow morning, I will have to renew my deadline, which would make me a loser. Yes, it’s a library book. Part of the fun is making the deadlines, duh. Saturday our books are due, and I get new books to read. I’m liking reading as long as I find books that interest me. Then, Saturday, I am also going shopping with my mother for school uniforms for the upcoming year. She’s taking us children separate so that not all her money is blown at once. I’m going first because I’m least likely to grow before school starts. I get my Vans.<333 Maybe since we’re going early, I’ll be able to find a lime green Nike school bag this year. I never get the bag I want because they’re all gone by the time we go school shopping—end of July. Well, I guess I’ll shut up for now and go read. Well, I have to check the rest of my social networking accounts first. Whatever. Adios.
This makes me really happy. I miss Michael. He was so cool and funny. Always really sweet, too.(: It sucks that he’s not taking honors next year. Eh, oh, well. Maybe he took Art III, and I may have that with him. Who knows?
I’ve been avoiding Tumblr all day because of his birthday. I love the kid, but due to jealousy I cannot stand to see other people post about him. Yes, I ridiculous. Deal with it. It’s not like I had the chance to get on here during the day anyway. I painted my mother’s bathroom today. I had to do three coats—the second base and two of the color. I hope that makes sense (“the color”). My father woke us all up at seven a.m., and it took me all day to do three coats of paint because I was getting lazy. I had, like, six or seven juice bars today. I’m fucking addicted. Also on Facebook, I joined this game called FrontierVille so that my mother had another neighbor whose frontier she can work on for rewards. I ended up starting playing because of my OCD. I just had to clear the things. Unfortunately, though, it requires energy, which either requires buying things or waiting. Therefore, my frontier is way ahead of me. I also wasted all my horseshoes, and I do not know how to get more other than mother fucking buying some with real USD—not happening. I’ll just publish the request for the items on my wall, I suppose. If you have Facebook, play the games, and/or are interested in trying out this one, add me on Facebook and add me as a neighbor, please. I usually never play the games either since I never get on. It looks like I’ll be getting on at least once a day now, eh? The link to my Facebook will be posted at the end of this post. Fuck, I forgot to return my pokes on Facebook, too. I’ll do that right before I log out. I have three engery from waiting this long, woo.
If you get more than 30, get some counselling. If you get more than 20, you’re paranoid. If you get 11-20, you are normal. If you get 10 or less, you’re fearless. People who don’t have any are full of crap. I fear … [x] black people [ ] the dark [x] staying single forever [ ] being a parent [ ] being myself in front of others [ ] open spaces [ ] closed spaces [ ] heights [x] dogs [ ] birds [ ] fish [x] spiders  flowers or other plants Total so far: 4 [ ] being touched [ ] fire [ ] deep deep water [x] snakes [ ] silk [ ] the ocean [ ] failure  success [ ] thunder/lightning [ ] frogs/toads [ ] my boyfriends/girlfriends dad [ ] my boyfriends/girlfriends mom [x] rats [ ] jumping from high places  snow Total so far: 6  rain  wind  crossing hanging bridges [ ] death [ ] heaven [x] being robbed/mugged [ ] falling  clowns [ ] dolls [ ] large crowds of people [ ] men [ ] women [ ] having great responsibilities [x] doctors [x] tornadoes Total so far: 8 [ ] hurricanes [ ] incurable diseases [ ] sharks  Friday the 13th [ ] scary movies [ ] poverty [ ] Halloween [ ] school [ ] trains [ ] odd numbers [ ] even numbers [ ] being alone [ ] becoming blind [ ] becoming deaf [x] growing up, old Total so far: 9 [x] creepy noises in the night [ ] not accomplishing my dreams/goals [ ] needles [ ] blood TOTAL: 10
Asian [ ] You have slanty/small eyes. [x] You like rice a lot. [x] You are good at math. [ ] You have played the piano. [ ] You have family from asia. [x] You laugh sometimes covering your mouth. [ ] Most people think you’re chinese. [ ] You call hurricanes typhoons. [ ] You go to Baulko. Total: 3
German [x] You like bread. [ ] You think German Chocolate is good. [x] You Speak some German. [x] You know what Schnitzel is. [ ] You hate it when stupid people call you a Nazi. [ ] You went to Pre-school. [x] You’re over 5’2 Total: 4
Canadian [ ] You like/play/played hockey. [ ] You love beer. [x] You say eh. [ ] You know what poutine is. [x] You speak some french. [ ] You love Tim Horton’s. [ ] At one point you lived in a farm house. [ ] You watch/watched degrassi. Total: 2
American [ ] You hate foriegners. [ ] You hate non - Christians. [x] You’re lazy. [ ] You are not cultured. [ ] You hate abortion. [x] But love the death penalty. [ ] You don’t read. [ ] You shop at walmart. [x] You think this survey is rather biased.
British [ ] You drink a lot of tea. [ ] You know what a brolly is. [ ] Deal or No Deal has taken over your life. [ ] You wanted Ben to win X Factor. [ ] You use the word “bugger”or the phrase “bloody hell.” [ ] Fish and Chips are yummy. [ ] You can eat a Full English Breakfast. [ ] You dislike emos almost as much as you dislike chavs. [ ] Its football…not soccer. Total: 0
Australian [ ] You wear flip flops all year. [ ] You call flip flops thongs not flip flops. [x] You love a backyard barbie. [x] You know a barbie is not a doll. [x] You love the beach. [x] Sometimes you swear without realizing. [ ] You’re a sports fanatic. [ ] You are tanned. [ ] You’re a bit of a bogan. [ ] You have an australian something Total: 4
Italian [ ] The Sopranos is a great show. [ ] Your last name ends in a vowel. [ ] Your grandmother makes her own sauces. [ ] You know how a real meatball tastes. [ ] You know Italian songs. [x] You have dark hair and dark eye color. [ ] You speak some Italian. [x] You are under 5’10” [ ] You know what a Italian horn is [x] Spaghetti is the best food in the world! [x] You talk with your hands. Total: 4
Spanish [ ] You say member instead of Remember. [ ] You speak Spanish or some. [x] You like tacos. [ ] YoU TyPe lIkE ThIs On Da CoMpUtEr. [ ] You are dark skinned. [ ] You know what a Puta is. [x] You talk fast occasionally. [ ] You have had highlights or have dyed your hair. [ ] You know what platanos are. Total: 2
Russian [ ] You say villian as: Vee-lon. [x] You get short tempered. [ ] You know of somebody named Natasha. [x] You get cold easily. [x] Rain is fun for you. [ ] You get into contests all the time. [x] You can easily make do with the cold weather. Total: 4 Irish [ ] You think beer is the best. [x] You have a bad temper. [ ] Your last name starts with a Mc, Murph, O’, Fitz or ends with a ley, on, un, an, in, ry, ly, y. [ ] You have blue or green eyes. [x] You like the color green. [ ] You have been to a st. pattys day party. [x] You have a family member from Ireland. [ ] You have/had blonde hair. [x] You have/had freckles. [ ] Your family get togethers always include drinking and singing. Total: 4
African American [ ] You say nigga/nukka casually [ ] You have nappy hair. [ ] You like rap. [ ] You know how to shoot a gun [ ] You think President George Walker Bush is racist. [ ] You like chicken. [x] You like watermelon. [ ] You can dance. [ ] You can ‘sing’ gospel. Total: 1